What is it Like to Be a Surrogate Mother?

A surrogacy agency can help you determine if you are qualified to become a surrogate mother and give you information on the surrogate process.

The surrogacy process involves many steps:

1. Meet surrogacy requirements
2. Prepare for your emotions
3. Communicate with the intended parents during your pregnancy
4. Follow the baby transition plan
5. Prepare for life after surrogacy

If you’re ready to start the surrogacy process, contact us today for advice. But, if you are still wondering what is it like to be a surrogate mother, read on. 

What is it Like to Be a Surrogate?

Being a surrogate can be a fulfilling, rewarding experience. Thanks to the brave and loving actions of a surrogate, two people get to fulfill their dreams of becoming parents.

But, you may also be thinking:

“Is it hard to be a surrogate mother?”

To understand what it is like to be a surrogate mother, you’ll need to understand the responsibilities of becoming a surrogate.

While every surrogacy is unique, there are common experiences  most surrogates have.

Step 1: Meet Surrogacy Requirements

Before you begin the surrogacy process, you’ll undergo medical and psychological screening to make sure you are ready for the potential challenges of being a surrogate. Your surrogacy professional will:

• Arrange for and guide you through these screenings
• Discuss your personal surrogacy goals to create the perfect surrogacy plan

Step 2: Prepare for Your Emotions

After you are approved to become a surrogate, you will start the process of finding intended parents. During this part of the process, you will:

• Create a surrogate profile
• Determine what kind of intended parents you are interested in carrying for
• Get to know the potential intended parents before solidifying a match

Step 3: Communicate with the Intended Parents During Your Pregnancy

Once you and the intended parents determine you are the right fit, you will complete your legal surrogacy contract.

Separate attorneys will represent your rights during this stage, which addresses the legal possibilities, complications, risks, and liabilities of the surrogacy process. Only after the surrogacy contract is signed can you begin the medical process of surrogacy.

Step 4: Follow the Baby Transition Plan

You’ve likely wondered how do surrogate mothers get pregnant. The answer is through an embryo transfer process. This involves:

• Taking certain fertility medications to prepare for the embryo transfer process
• Traveling to the intended parents’ fertility clinic (costs will be covered by the intended parents)
• Undergoing the relatively quick and painless medical procedure to complete the embryo transfer
• Returning to the clinic after a few weeks to confirm the pregnancy

Step 5: Prepare for Life After Surrogacy

After you give birth, your surrogacy is complete. Depending on your legal contract, you may need to sign a statement about parental rights. You will also need to decide what to do with your breast milk. You will likely be able to utilize maternity leave as you recover.

The Emotions of Surrogacy

Your surrogacy professional will help you prepare for these emotions by requiring you to undergo psychological screening before you can become a surrogate.

What It’s Like to Be a Surrogate Before Your Pregnancy

As you start your surrogacy process, there are some important personal questions you’ll need to ask yourself, like:

Do You Want to Work with an Agency?

You will need to work with three different types of professionals to pursue surrogacy:

• Full-service surrogacy agency
• A lawyer (independent surrogacy)
• A surrogacy clinic

These professionals play a vital role in the process, but possibly none more so than your surrogacy agency.

Full-service surrogacy agencies often provide:

• Reputable advice that manages every aspect of your surrogacy
• Experienced medical professionals and attorneys
• 24/7 practical and emotional support
• Intended parent search guidance
• And more

The following are some of the full-service agencies you could work with:

• American Surrogacy
• Southern Surrogacy
• Growing Generations

How Will Your Surrogacy Affect Your Family?

Your responsibilities as a partner and a mother to your child or children will be affected by your surrogacy responsibilities, and it may present you with new challenges.

What if the First Embryo Transfer Does Not Work?

It’s possible that an embryo transfer won’t be successful on the first try. This is more common than you may think.

How surrogate mothers are affected by this setback will depend on their preparation for this common occurrence. A good surrogacy professional will be there to support you and the intended parents if this happens.

What It’s Like to Be a Surrogate During Your Pregnancy

As you carry the intended parents’ baby and people learn about your surrogacy journey, you’ll likely get the same question:

“Do surrogate mothers get attached to the child?”

It’s important to know that:

• Although you may wonder, “do surrogates get attached,” most surrogates don’t develop the same bond with a baby during a surrogate pregnancy as they do during their own pregnancy. This is because most modern surrogacies are gestational surrogacies, meaning you aren’t related to the baby.
• In addition to coping with your emotions of pregnancy and carrying a baby for someone else, you should also be prepared to answer questions about your surrogate pregnancy.
• You’ll also be dealing with heightened emotions due to pregnancy hormones while handling everyday family. Surrogate support groups can help.

What It’s Like to Be a Surrogate After Your Pregnancy

It’s important to prepare for how you may feel after your pregnancy. Try to consider:

• How you felt after your last delivery
• That you could develop postpartum depression 
• That you may have to call on your support system

But you’ll also feel excited knowing you have helped create a family and achieved any financial goals you may have set.

Next Steps After Discovering What’s it Like to be a Surrogate

What it is like to be a surrogate mother will always be different for each person. Your surrogacy goals and preferences will impact the surrogacy journey that lies ahead.

If you want to learn more about surrogacy, you can contact a surrogacy professional today.